I AM LEARNING HOW TO PERSUADE MYSELF NOT TO BE LATE AGAIN

We all know that being late is closely linked to many other bad habits such as being lazy, avoiding responsibility, ineffective time management skills, being unable to understand that making other people waiting is not good, or a lack of motivation, procrastination and many more. It is so true, I have ever thought that such a habit as being “late” can be associated with something quite negative, incompetence, self-centeredness, lack of integrity or increased stress and just being lazy in everything.

People who know me know that I have never been late for anything in my whole life. But then I was brought up that way. My parents taught me a lesson that all latecomers didn’t learn or neglect. When I was 6 years old and older my father would make me miss whatever or wherever it was I should have done or been if I couldn’t be ready 25 minutes early to the time estimate to get anywhere or do anything. Whether I had appointments, went to soccer practice or Judo training deadlines, or even attending churches or catching a movie on a regular basis I had to technically give myself 25 minutes early. At first, I had a very hard time to proper measure my times but when I realize the more I was on time the more respect I owned from my peers so somehow I felt less stress about what I was doing.

My father always believes that being late is the rudest things. He thinks it is something everyone can learn. For example, I had a typical neighbor and friend who was constantly and embarrassingly late and I hated it. It wasn't laziness or lack of caring, just poor estimation of how long something would take him to just get done on a timely fashion. One day, I advised him to follow my father’s secret system for being late. I know it was stupid but maybe he could just start with small stuff first like brushing his teeth, or taking a shower. So we would end up leaving 10 or 15 minutes after we should have done. At least I was not able to help him be ready 25 minutes early but he was always ahead of his daily schedules and everyone thought he became a punctual person.

As my father has decided ‘years’ ago to teach me how to be on time, today I can confirm how easy it is to handle punctuality. I can go to bed at 2 am and up at 5:30 am every day no matter during week days or weekends. I’m rather a few minutes early to my appointments than just being on time. A couple months ago, I gave a talk about leadership to a small group student at Clark Atlanta University in which I gave an extended version of this article. One of the students in the room gave me this compliment after my presentation that ‘‘I would be never late again and would never miss an appointment’’. I wish I had a father like yours when I was growing up.” I was chocked but knew I would make a difference in her life. That is my harvest of the seed I’ve put out several years back. One answer I gave to a question from the crowd was ‘when you are on time, you feel more in control of your life you feel more in balance. Although, I use my blackberry to carry my appointments and meetings but I don’t need a reminder on my mobile, I have a good feeling of what my transition time is and I put in some extra empty times like 25 minutes to allow me to be on time and no stress, not late, no loss of credibility.

I have an old and very dear friend who is constitutionally incapable of being on time. Although I won’t say her name here because I have many many very punctual friends, It's literally her only fault, I absolutely love her but I think she has a kind of tolerance about being late, almost as if she's trying to prove something. I've watched her trying to keep appointments and she will only just start to prepare for the meeting at the appointed hour. For example, if she has to be somewhere at 11:00, then at exactly 11:00 she will say "oh shit, I better start putting my make-up on" and laugh. Even though, she knows it’s going to take half an hour to get there. It frustrated me so much about her I would say something to her, but I don't remember it would drive her to change her behavior towards being on time. It simply just does not occur to her to do things such as check on time. There’s time she can remind herself to, but sometimes she just doesn’t, and she really feels she has no control over her behavior.

For all you latecomers out there, it is very important for you to understand that it is necessary to teach yourselves to be punctual. Making other people waiting, missing deadlines and running behind their schedules is something that may cause significant impact on everyone around them, and it actually contradicts with the full idea of a great leader. We all do it when we get closer to an appointment, you always feel the desire to do something other than getting ready or you want to see if you can get one more thing done before you go. So you end up being late and sometimes making other people who have waited for you late as well. That is why in order to break down the wall of being unpunctual; you should develop a learning process that will allow you to proper manage your times. A good exercise can be first writing down all your tasks and actions for the day, and then prioritizing them accordingly. Write the most important and the most necessary things to be done on the top of your paper or on your calendar, followed by less important and the least important things. Choose to do first only the things which are vital and essential for you, and understand the fact that watching the 10 top plays on ESPN Sportscenter or cleaning the house are not that important sometimes. Also, increase your awareness of the fact that being on time is also a key factor that plays an important role and can serve you for good in a great deal of various situations in your life! Very punctual people are always higher achievers, more discipline, appreciated, respected and are generally more successful in their life than latecomer folks.

Ok those are good lessons and tactics for being punctual, and how to change our bad habits and take more control of our life in order to become a better and more responsible person. What other advice do you have for people who will read this article but can’t figure out how to be always on time? Let us know your tips and techniques in the comment box bellow.



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Rony Delgarde